Thursday, December 22, 2016

In Which We Read Yet Another Grimm's Fairy Tale Ripoff... Blarg.

It's an appropriately winter-themed cover to Master Comics #46!

I'm not sure who "the gang" is there, but we don't see them in the interior of the comic, so I guess they decided they had better things to do.

Here's yet another historically interesting piece:

If you don't want to read the tiny print, they're basically saying that they're printing fewer copies as part of the war effort and some comics might arrive late due to transportation difficulties.  That must have been one heck of a time to be alive, regardless of where you were or what you were doing.

Anyway, let's check out the main story:

Well, Dillwhink isn't just going to sit there and let some guy insult his manhood as a gardener... or something... so he goes into his basement and randomly throws chemicals into a beaker: 

Because as anyone who reads comics knows, mixing random chemicals solves everything.

And then this happens:

Oh, yeesh.  Don't tell me...

Yup.  This is happening.

I'm going to butt in here: Why does disabled Freddy Freeman have to deliver the paper to Mr. Dillwhink?  Freddy sells them on the street corner and if Dillwhink insists on personal delivery from the guy with physical limitations, he's a jerk.

Maybe the cloud giant didn't want his home invaded.  HINT HINT.

Geez, CMJ.  Leave the guy alone!

Hmmm... I wouldn't have expected the lightning to bother a member of the Marvel Family, seeing as how they zap themselves with lightning on a regular basis.  Oh, well.

Yeah, the Cloud Giant is clearly a menace with which CMJ needs to concern himself, what with his insistence on taking a nap and all.  Isn't there a war going on somewhere?

Yup.  Valid point for the Cloud Giant.

Okay, first?  The goose is awesome and should make regular appearances.  Second?  Dillwhink is going out of his way to convince me CMJ should have just let him go splat at the beginning of the story.

Again: Cloud Giant has a very valid complaint here.

Yes, and you should let the Cloud Giant beat Dillwhink back to the Stone Age.

You know, CMJ should really just stay out of this whole thing.

And as if this story hadn't completely lost me from the moment I learned of the premise, it gets worse.

Dillwhink is caught in the act of stealing from the Cloud Giant, but nothing happens to him because CMJ returns the Goose.  

That's not how law works.  Also, the Cloud Giant decides CMJ is his pal because CMJ saved the Cloud Giant from falling... after CMJ caused him to fall in the first place.  

Okay, I'm done.  I can't take any more.

See you soon!


Cflmaior said...

I would like to point out that "Jack and the Beanstalk" - uh-oh - "Mr. Dillwhink and the Beanstalk" - is not part of the Grimm Brother's corpus, this English fairy tale having been actually first printed in 1734. The Grimm tale most akin to this story is The Devil with the Three Golden Hairs (Der Teufel mit den drei goldenen Haaren) (1857), which, however, does not mention magic beans or golden egg-laying geese. However, I'm sure that the brass at DC (I mean District of Columbia) would like very much to have a bomb-laying bird flying over Germany.

Frothy said...

I, too, would love to know what the cloud giant does with those golden eggs...

nlpnt said...

The cover hints at something you've brought up elsewhere - it shows CMJ just enjoying himself in his powered-up form, rather than saving the world and racing back to become Freddy Freeman with his struggle with basic mobility. I suppose it was mainly space concerns that led to this never coming up in stories - especially with the wartime publishing schedule.