Friday, September 30, 2016

In Which Captain Marvel Fights Jolly Roger.... Yes, Jolly Roger....

So yesterday we were talking about the rut that CMJ tends to fall into with the repeated battles against Captain Nazi.  I think the creative team finds itself in a bind because CMJ's stories aren't as silly as Captain Marvel Senior's, so there isn't as much wiggle room.

Case in point: Master Comics 35

With an awesome cover that unfortunately has nothing to do with the story inside, we pick things up thusly:

Your father's life of crime leads to his early death?  Well, of course you're going to take up a life of crime!  Look at how well that worked out for your father.  It's especially stupid because Danny Boy there was an aspiring musician, so it's not like he had nothing else going for him.

But he heard the siren call of REVENGE! (tm!)

REVENGE! (tm!)

So, Danny gets his own gang in the most ridiculous way possible:

Uh-huh.  Until Danny turned his back and those criminals gunned him down.

What?  They didn't?  Really?


Oh, man.  I think I liked my "and he was gunned down by the criminals in an attempted gang takeover" storyline better.  Off to the Costume Hall of Shame (tm!) with you!

And this goes about as you'd expect:

What?  CMJ, use some sense!

See?  That's what happens.  Reason either works, or someone is determined to learn the hard way.  Guess which route Danny was taking?

And it almost got CMJ killed:


And then things were back on track:

Hey!  Random Spanking! (tm!)

It can't be all bad if it ends with a Random Spanking! (tm!)

But it certainly wasn't good.

Speaking of which:

Please, Bulletgirl, we already have silly costumes.  Could we go fight crime with SOME dignity?

That's it for me!  See you Monday!

Thursday, September 29, 2016

In Which Captain Nazi Can Now Fly So He Can Get His Ass Kicked ABOVE the Ground to Mix Things Up

Wow, things were higgelty-piggelty here at CMNS, weren't they?  Monday's post appeared on Friday, nothing new until today... gives you an idea of the kind of week I've been having.

Anyway, by the time we get to the 33rd issue of Master Comics, I find myself wondering if folks weren't finding the CMJ formula a little stale:

You know the drill by now: Captain Nazi escapes, does something awful, gets his butt kicked, repeat:


Well, they must have figured that as satisfying as it may be to punch out a Nazi, it was something of a rut.  So the next issue gave us something new:

Yup... Captain Nazi starts flying (with some gorgeous cover art)!

It's a shame they didn't keep the purple cape, because it was much cooler.

Anyway, Hitler was apparently also getting bored with the repeated thrashings:

so there's an upgrade...

which leads to funny images like this:

and not so funny images like this:

which we all know will not go unchallenged:

and it leads to aerial fights for something of a change:

but apparently, being able to fly isn't making him any tougher.

Anyway, don't forget he's got to top up:

And then we have this:

Yeah, CMJ... love you like I do, I think Captain Nazi is probably right on that one... he's going to escape again.

Well, okay.  I suppose Well... That's That. (tm!)

Meanwhile, I've said it before and I'll say it again:

Don't use a phone in comics.

Hey, did he say gorilla?

Yeah!  Let's see Bulletman fight a gorilla!

Good stuff!

I'll try to keep up better, folks!  See you soon!

Friday, September 23, 2016

In Which Captain Marvel Junior Soars with Green Eagles!

Shaping up to be a busy day, so we may not have a post tomorrow.  But we can stop and enjoy Master Comics #32:

That's an iconic cover that you've probably seen before... although I don't think they keep the eagle green when they use the image again.

Anyway, the story involves "Dr. Krool."  So, was that his real last name?  Well....

... it might be a nickname.  Sure, he might just be living up (or down, as the case may be) to the name he was given, but if he didn't start out life with the name, "Krool," he clearly earned it by that time.

But no disabled orphan kids get squished by trucks on Junior's watch:

Well, it's not Captain Nazi but he's certainly deserving of a Captain Marvel Jr. butt-kicking.  So, Freddy infiltrates the joint:

It's a little funny to have the magic word said off-panel because you just know what's coming:

Hey!  Random Butt-Kicking! (tm!)

Anyway, there's a complication so Junior had to leave and re-infiltrate as Freddy Freeman (because apparently no one noticed him getting struck by lightning earlier), but it would only be a matter of time before there were more well-deserved beatings to be administered:

And then:

I admit, that had me check the cover again to make sure he wasn't flying with a vulture.  But no, it was an eagle.  A green eagle, but still an eagle.

And then Junior catches up to the bad guys, free to smack them around for your entertainment:

And then this happened:

Let the disabled kids have their fun!  But let's drug test them first to make sure they deserve it!  And I want a tax receipt!

Yup... this was A Very Special Story. (tm!)

Moving on.  Check out the worst disguise I've seen in a while:

Wow.  That's... awkward and ineffective all at once.

Time for another installment of Well.... touche! (tm!)

Well.... touche! (tm!)

Seriously, that is worse than useless as a disguise.  Yeesh!

Check out Buck Jones:

He had a regular feature in Master Comics, what with being a famous movie star and all.

Then I saw this house ad at the end of the issue:

I'm prepared to guess we've seen the last of Buck Jones in comics.

See you tomorrow?  More likely Wednesday.  Anyway, see you soon!