Wednesday, April 2, 2014

Superman, Supergirl and Some Strange Kid Who Has Managed to Live About 8 Years Without Ever Seeing a Rainbow

Let's finish up our look at Action Comics #265, with a cringeworthy demonstration of why your average male reader will never admit to being a Supergirl fan:

You've never seen a rainbow?  There's too much greenery for me to think they're living in a desert, so I can only assume they keep that kid locked in the basement at the Midvale Orphanage.

Well, Mary Jane, Tommy is correct about the good fairies, but one really doesn't have anything to do with the other.  The staff at the Midvale Orphanage clearly needs to take you out more.

Linda Lee isn't doing Mary Jane any favors here.  She's going to go back in and tell the other kids at the orphanage about the quantifiable evidence of the existence of a good fairy and they're going to laugh her right back into the basement.  Maybe this is her super-villain origin.  DC should totally run with this.

Meanwhile, Superman is being a jerk.  Wow.  How out of character.: 

No, Supergirl.  Don't placate him.  The reason it worked was because you were in your civilian identity at the time, which means you can blend into the scenery when you're in street clothes whether the world knows you're Supergirl or not.

Yeah!  Go sit yourself back at the orphanage until he needs you again.

Okay, then there was some blah-blah about Supergirl losing her memory and she ends up in Smallville for some reason.  Don't ask me for details, because I don't remember them.

Anyway, she sees this:

So, Superboy carved a statue of himself out of the world's largest diamond.  Well, he has always been his own favorite subject.

Anyway, Supergirl doesn't remember that she's not supposed to be seen as Supergirl, so she does good super-deeds out in the open in Smallville for an entire day.

But Superman won't have any of that.

So, to recap: Superman compromised the integrity of the Fourth Estate (pretty noteworthy considering he's a journalist in his other identity) and subjected an entire town to a non-FDA-approved gas laced with a substance capable of causing death to Supergirl herself.

Yes, we know, Supergirl.  The world thought it was great that you were out there, fighting the good fight and giving people hope.  But Superinsecureman will risk your life before he allows you to share any of his spotlight.

What a super-tool.

See you tomorrow!


MarvelX42 said...

Yeah. I never did understand wht Supes wouldn't just let her be a superhero too. He friggin let Krypto fly around saving people, but not Supergirl?

Tracer Bullet said...

I don't understand why she listens to Superham in the first place. Aren't teenagers supposed to be rebellious? She's a 16-year-old who can fly and bench press semi-trucks. Why doesn't she just leave the damned orphanage and do her own thing? She could get a lounge show in Las Vegas or something.

Peter Gray said...

Very funny...and sooo over the you say What the heck!!!

NB said...

What a dick.

Anonymous said...

Linda being wistful again at the end of the story. I never understood WHY Superman kept Supergirl's existence a secret. I mean, she can move at the speed of light, and there are already a zillion other survivors of Krypton.