Thursday, November 13, 2008

Mr. W.I.Zard Thursday!

You know, it just occurred to me that it's November and I haven't picked up either of the Big Two's summer events. Are Final Crisis and Secret Invasion over? I don't like to read something until I can get all the parts together.

Hide yer womenfolk! It's time for All-Star Comics #34!

Oh, come on! W.I.Zard? That's right up there with "I.Rekoj" as the lamest alias ever. If I'm ever asked my name again, I'm going to call myself "B.I. Teme" and see if anyone sees through my clever ruse.

But even more maddening is no one in the JSA figures it out, even though they are also talking about their new foe, the Wizard:

Yep. It's a shame we can't get a lead on the Wizard. But it sure is nice of W.I.Zard to offer us financial support. I'm sure we can trust him.

A shadowy figure is spotted in JSA Headquarters! Finally!

.... and, for some reason, Wonder Woman takes this opportunity to do the Twist.

But at least someone finally figures out the big puzzle of the day:

Great one there, lab partner! This embarrassing incident is why subsequent super-teams always had a Batman, Mr. Fantastic, or Brainiac 5 on call.

And then, as always, I get distracted by the ads, which are more entertaining than the story itself:

Now, I didn't do much in the way of team sports, because that really wasn't my thing. But is in common for coaches to spoon-feed their players? Maybe I should have tried out for Ed Krause's team - I don't know who he was, but I would have liked the perks!

Cue Captain Tootsie!:

Yeah, Tootsie Rolls are a great source of energy. They're in the health food isle, right next to the Boca Burgers.

Next, we see why you should never work in a science lab in comics:

Hear that? Nothing can go wrong!

Never say "Nothing can go wrong" in a comic book. You're just asking for it.

I can't take any more! Cue Green Lantern fighting a dragon for no particular reason!

Much better. See you tomorrow!


Erich said...

"There's enough energy in a Tootsie Roll to skate 2 1/2 miles!"

Or, to put it another way, you need to skate 2 1/2 miles to burn off the calories from a Tootsie Roll.

SallyP said...

You know, when Hawkman, of all people, is the smartest one on your team, you're in BIG trouble.

And the reason they were able to be invaded, was because they had poor Wonder Woman doing all the filing, instead of manning her desk in the reception area. Learn to delegate, people!

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Thomas Fummo said...

'Then --- tragedy!'

made me guffaw into my coffee.

now my macbook is all wet. CURSE YOUUUU!!!

And The Green Latern sucks at poetry:

"Against this monstrous thing,
my power ring,



Anonymous said...

Seriously, if you're going to give a villain the most pathetic pseudonym in history, don't have a character figure it out halfway through the book. If they never figure it out, that's authorial license. If one of them figures it out, it makes them all look incredibly stupid and the one who solved it slightly less stupid.

Hey, at least Ed Krause is giving that kid something healthy. He could be feeding him a bowl of Tootsie Rolls. "Enough energy to power Las Vegas! Nothing can go wrong!"

Anonymous said...

Nicely drawn lab explosion, though. :)

-- cleome45