Wednesday, March 19, 2008

The Moral Decay of Clark Kent

I was giving Night Girl, Polar Boy and Plant Lad grief about their awful costumes yesterday, but this one deserves it's own post. Check out Fire Lad's origin:

What an amazing coincidence that I was given fire-related powers! Good thing I was already wearing a fire-themed costume!

And now, I give you the downward spiral of Clark Kent:

Yeah, my boy Clark is one bump on the head away from being a ward of the State.

Um.... I'm standing right here, Pa!

Did I tell you to quit sackin', boy?

Lana Lang: Whore.

Desperate for acceptance, Clark joins the Skinheads. But even they don't bother to learn his real name....

(yes, I know.... Clark was using a different secret ID at the time.... I was more amazed that a fraternity had a "crew cut" requirement.... no wonder I never joined anything.....)


Anonymous said...

Maybe the Legionnaires rejected Fire Lad because that fire-breathing posture is a little too... suggestive?

Frat boy: "You're also required to spend a couple hours a day modeling our handsome crew cuts, like Glenn and Brad in the corner there."

Michael Jones said...

"I've got a first-prize willie too, hiding behind this cash register."
I interpreted Joe's comment as calling "Clark" a "Mark" meaning victim.

Anonymous said...

If only the cash register scene had featured Robin instead of Superboy. Then we could have had:



Why, oh why couldn't that have been Robin's dad?

Oh, right, he's dead.

Carry on.

SallyP said...

Gee, poor Clark does look a little peeved there. Can't say that I blame him, ol' Pa Kent there, is pretty cold.

Do you suppose that woman just ran from store to store, all along Main street, accosting perfect strangers so that she could brag about her kid?

Damn Yuppies.

De said...

Fire Lad's comment about causing "accidental holocausts" is oddly disturbing.

Anonymous said...

gonna buy me a moped!

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