Wednesday, March 31, 2010

In Which We Realize It May Never End Wednesday!

I think it's over. I went through all five issues of Nature Boy and got all the ha-ha's out of it I could find. Except this one:

That's right! Of course there was a Nature Girl! Why wouldn't there be? And, just like Miss Muscles, we have no idea what her origin is or how she relates (if at all) to Nature Boy.

But we do know this:

She has a pet elephant. And she travels by being flung through the trees, by the trees themselves. I have no idea what that entails, and I'll admit I'm a bit underwhelmed at the detail of the artwork. Then again, if I were the artist and I read that I had to draw someone travelling by being "flung from one tree to another," I would probably have just blown that off as well.

Here's some deep characterization of the bad guy:

Lazlo hates elephants. What the heck more do you need to know? It's not like there's ever going to be a Lazlo mini-series! He hates elephants! Pay attention and quit asking stupid questions!

And Nature Girl, for reasons we don't know, apparently controls gravity:

Of course, I'm not sure that by putting the rifle at even zero gravity would be enough to wrest it out of Lazlo's grip. He'd be more likely to say, "Wow, my rifle sure doesn't seem that heavy right now! I could shoot elephants all day!"

But anyway, here's a little jungle justice:

You and I both know there's no way he can run ten miles. Lazlo is about to have the back of his skull sprayed all over the landscape.

See? What they didn't have space to put in was Lazlo's dialogue:

"*huff* *puff* Mercy! *huff* I can't *huff* *puff* go any further *huff* AIIIEEEEE!"


Followed by the sound of various jungle carnivores taking turns at Lazlo's remains.

See? Now, that's entertainment.

Some day, I'll get my own series. You just watch.

See you Thursday!


AndyDecker said...

A shame that we never will know if King Newton lends Nature Girl the awesome Power of Gravity. Or is it Queen Newton?

This must be some of the lamest comics ever :-) Great stuff! Thanks.

Anonymous said...

And yet her powers seem to make more sense than Nature Boy. Ever since I heard his name I thought he would have control over animals and plants not the weather. And at least she doesnt have to shout things.
The only way I see that gravity thing working is if she makes herself have a gravitaional pull. I supose its possible.

Anonymous said...

Nature Girl's friends are Elephants. Nature Boy's friends are bunny rabbits. What does that tell you?

Sleestak said...

More likely Lazlo will drop from a coronary and the CSI team will be trying to figure out who would shoot a dead man.

LissBirds said...

I knew Victor Lazlo had a dark side, I just never imagined it was as a poacher...

"I could shoot elephants all day!" LOL.

Allergy said...

If I were the letterer and I were supposed to convey the terrified trumpeting of an elephant in danger, I think I'd go for something a little more than "uroooo".

Just me, though.