Friday, October 28, 2016

The Singing Killer!... would have a hard time sneaking up on people.

Hey, gang!  Rough couple of days on the horizon, so it may be a few days before I post again.  But for now, let's check out Master Comics #39!

Starting things off right with another installment of

Well.... Touche! (tm!)

Well.... Touche! (tm!)

It wasn't the greatest CMJ story, so let's move on to Bulletman:

This was a very interesting and topical choice of a villain.  For those wondering if this about someone who has too many cats to properly take care of them, a quick history lesson is in order:  Back in WWII, stuff was rationed in the U.S. as part of the war effort.

I said it was brief.  Anyway, here's the guy:

Yup.  It's a little heavy-handed with the message, but even the most dull-witted child would figure out that we had to put the needs of soldiers first.

One thing leads to another and:

Isn't that kind of overkill with the dog?  I mean, I know he can fly, but I'm pretty sure a leash would still get the job done.  But the Hoarder is nothing if not thorough.

Off we fly!

Is Bulletdog taking a whiz?  While flying?  I'm pretty sure he is.

And that's awesome!

Anyway... off we fly!

Hey, someone remind me if the dog is bulletproof.  If not, I'm not sure I'm so cool with them taking the dog into combat.  Surely he is.  But you don't want to assume a thing like that.

In any event, Bulletgirl is having yet another good day:

Okay, that isn't a coincidence.  Someone decided to make her more efficient.  From a storytelling perspective, that was a good call.  But for purposes of this blog, that is not so awesome.  She's normally a deep well of material and I'm losing out on a sure thing if she's going to be competent from this day forward.

Hey!  It's Hopalong Cassidy!

And they could have just stopped right there because the bad guy did indeed go down with one punch.  But let's take a look at him and see if we're missing anything:

Nope.  Nope, nope, nope, nope, nope.

Although he gets points for sneaking in a line about how he likes to "mak love."  There are children reading this thing, but that's still hilarious so I'm completely torn here.

Oh, well.  See you soon!

Thursday, October 27, 2016

In Which Bulletgirl Actually Turns in a Decent Job Performance

Hey, gang!

Thanks for bearing with me.  As always, I just find myself coming and going depending on how life goes and I'm sorry about that.  Thanks as always for bearing with me, now and in the future.

Now let's look at Master Comics #37!

Again, what a pretty cover!  Inside, we meet the rudest mailman ever:

Well, since you called her "old lady," she would be well within her bounds to give you directions to the nearest sensitivity training.

But it doesn't end there:

Wow... can I just get my mail without all the judgment?

Well, credit to him for actually delivering the mail.  That's more than my mailman often does.... especially on weekends.

Anyway, the letter calls Freddy to go visit someone but the quality of the fiche is such that I can't be bothered to read it.  So, for whatever reason he goes there just in time to see this:


Kick his ass, Freddy! 

THANK you.

That was kinda funny.  Like there are rules to this: I shot you! You're dead!  You have to fall down now!

Long story short, the Nazis get theirs in this rather crowded panel:

Not that I could do any better.

On to the Bulletman story, where Bulletgirl is not only uncharacteristically effective but rather witty as well:

That was pretty good, considering the source.  But then this happens:

So, Bulletman can shrug off bullets, but a book thrown at him knocks him off his pins.  Okie-dokie.  COMICS, kids!

Did Bulletgirl just take out the bad guy?  She totally did.

What a weird issue.  I'm not sure how to process it all.

See you soon!  And thanks!

Wednesday, October 19, 2016


Dear Ones, I'm sorry about the lack of content.  I'm just having a hard time finding the time and energy to put new stuff up.  I guess life just hits us in waves like that.  I'm sure I will get back into the groove at some point, but I'm just digging my way through obligations for now.

Thanks for bearing with me!  Please keep an eye out on Facebook or use the RSS feed if you want to be alerted.  Otherwise, check back every so often and I'm sure I'll find my mojo again.


Monday, October 3, 2016

In Which Bulletgirl's Incompetence Kills a Civilian. Yeah, You THINK I'm Kidding!

Check out this quite awesome cover from Master Comics #36!

Nothing about the CMJ story grabbed me, but the issue wasn't a total wash.  Check out the bad guy from the Bulletman tale:

Yes, he is The Wizard, a name which surprisingly has never been used by an A-list villain.  I mean, Marvel Comics have that Fantastic Four villain, but he's kind of ... you know... eh.

Anyway, with this Wizard we see lots of Random Ray Usage! (tm!)

Wasn't that the plot of the Lego Batman 2 video game?  It seems like I remember seeing a lot of that.

Hmmmm... homicide by Random Ray Usage (tm!)?  I don't remember seeing a lot of that in the Lego Batman 2 video game.

Anyway, skipping ahead (and as always, I'm doing you a favor), Bulletman figure out how to repel the Wizard's Random Ray Usage! (tm!)

Well, that is until...

Man... she is worse than useless.  Just don't touch stuff, Bulletgirl!  That's all we ask!  You don't have to help, just don't make stuff worse!

Wow.  Okay, so even if Bulletman recovers (which we all know he does), Bulletgirl just caused that taxi driver's death.  True, she didn't pull the trigger, but the fact is that this guy wouldn't have died if Bulletgirl had just stayed out of the way.

But since it's the 1940's, she gets over it before the story is over.  COMICS, kids!  COMICS!

See you tomorrow!

Friday, September 30, 2016

In Which Captain Marvel Fights Jolly Roger.... Yes, Jolly Roger....

So yesterday we were talking about the rut that CMJ tends to fall into with the repeated battles against Captain Nazi.  I think the creative team finds itself in a bind because CMJ's stories aren't as silly as Captain Marvel Senior's, so there isn't as much wiggle room.

Case in point: Master Comics 35

With an awesome cover that unfortunately has nothing to do with the story inside, we pick things up thusly:

Your father's life of crime leads to his early death?  Well, of course you're going to take up a life of crime!  Look at how well that worked out for your father.  It's especially stupid because Danny Boy there was an aspiring musician, so it's not like he had nothing else going for him.

But he heard the siren call of REVENGE! (tm!)

REVENGE! (tm!)

So, Danny gets his own gang in the most ridiculous way possible:

Uh-huh.  Until Danny turned his back and those criminals gunned him down.

What?  They didn't?  Really?


Oh, man.  I think I liked my "and he was gunned down by the criminals in an attempted gang takeover" storyline better.  Off to the Costume Hall of Shame (tm!) with you!

And this goes about as you'd expect:

What?  CMJ, use some sense!

See?  That's what happens.  Reason either works, or someone is determined to learn the hard way.  Guess which route Danny was taking?

And it almost got CMJ killed:


And then things were back on track:

Hey!  Random Spanking! (tm!)

It can't be all bad if it ends with a Random Spanking! (tm!)

But it certainly wasn't good.

Speaking of which:

Please, Bulletgirl, we already have silly costumes.  Could we go fight crime with SOME dignity?

That's it for me!  See you Monday!