Friday, January 10, 2014

There's Something About a Girl in a Conical Hat...

Golden Age Green Lantern #29 devoted all three tales to Green Lantern's relationship with the Golden Age Harlequin. As you can see, it's like shooting fish in a barrel to stick her in the Costume Hall of Shame (tm!), but I'd lose all my credibility as a serious comic book journal if I didn't put it there.  Because I'm the Walter Freakin' Conkrite of comic book bloggers, you know:

Based on the above photo, she appears to be very bendy.

Anyway, the Harlequin was always trying to convince GL that he had the hots for her.  Between the hat and the collar, and don't know how Alan was able to resist her feminine wiles.  Apparently the whole "will power" thing translates into the ability to turn down women who have no shame regarding their fashion sense.

The last story was the most interesting of the bunch, where the Harlequin agrees to surrender to the tender mercies of the criminal justice system (and, I presume, the producers of What Not to Wear) if GL agreed to act as her defense attorney.

This results in the United States getting covered by Disembodied Floating Heads (tm!):

However, the concept of zealous advocacy is lost on Alan:

Hmmm... I hate to armchair quarterback Alan, but if the outcome of the trial is that she's acquitted, I'm pretty sure the subsequent prosecution and imprisonment isn't likely to happen.  In any event, criminal defense attorneys are there to protect the Constitutional rights of every citizen (y'see, if you don't follow due process for the worst of us, then none of us have those protections), so calling them criminals is.... well, Alan can just suck it.  Go back to your little radio station, asshat.

Anyhoo, the logistical problem with the Harlequin is that she worked with Alan, so if she disappeared as her civilian self every time the Harlequin was in the slam, even Alan would connect the dots eventually.  So, she would always escape in the end:

Seriously.  Three stories, and she escaped three times.

This is quite a shift from the Joker's solo title back in the 70's, where the Comics Code Authority had some standard that the bad guy always had to get a come-uppance in the end.

The Joker's solo title was pretty bitchin', by the way:


Jim...  dreams of cough drops.

See you Monday! 

1 comment:

MarvelX42 said...

No! Don't trade Mark! He's our best player!