XXX-Men Monday!

I'll bet with that title, I get more traffic than I've ever imagined. Hi, Googlers!

As we bid farewell to the Original X-Men, who were nowhere near as entertaining as I had hoped, let's check out Cyclops, who finally smacks Magneto but doesn't quite have his repartee down:


Really?

We waited 51 issues for that?

The sad thing is, you can tell Cyclops had rehearsed that speech a thousand times in his head, but it didn't come out right. "You're number one on my..... uh.... I dunno.... RAT'S LIST!" Wow, that's sad. You can just see Bobby and Warren shaking their heads off panel, wondering why they didn't let Hank be the spokesperson for the group.

You know this is why Scott never got anywhere with Jean.
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From X-Men #53:


I don't know exactly what kind of machine Jean's hooked herself up to, but she ain't exactly complainin'!


You may feel some discomfort, Jean! But don't worry about it! It's not really good unless it hurts a little!


Oh, no! Did I just say that? That's so wrong!




Now, look: If we're going to run a clean shop here, we can't have Blastaar aiming himself at other people's vitals that way, especially in that position. Hey, my eyes are up here, mister!

Thankfully, Cyclops can bring us back to quiet reflection and dignity:

Say what?

No, I'm pretty sure the guy's dead. We can appreciate that it's been years and you still haven't gotten to second base with Jean, but what say you talk a little less and just zap things with your eyeballs when we tell you to?

So long, Original X-Men! You were one of the few Stan Lee / Jack Kirby comics that was canceled within 5 years (making it one of their least successful corroborations ever) , and now we have a better understanding as to why. We shall barely miss ye.