Mac is a Wonderful He-Man!

It's Monday!  That can only mean that it's time to check out Pep Comics #60!

This is a variation on the Charles Atlas "Making a Man out of 'Mac'" ad that I hadn't previously seen.  And I've read a lot of comics, so let's presume it's rare:

Wow.  Way to represent women of the '50s there, Alice.

He and Alice are stepping out?  I have always wanted an excuse to play this video:

Isn't that beautiful?  The moral of that story is that even if you only get to live your dream for an evening, celebrate that opportunity.  

Our music was just better than the crap they put out today.  Don't make me prove it, or this blog will be littered with music videos.

Anyway, Gorilla Gus and Alice are gonna go "steppin' out":

This is what I've never understood about these ads.  Rather than find a nice girl who is actually worth his time and effort, Mac decides to become a bodybuilder.  Oh yeah, that's a much more constructive use of his time.

Because, after all, why cultivate a positive relationship with someone when you can have ten seconds of short-term satisfaction via violence?:

And so, Mac had his....

REVENGE! (tm!)

Of course, Alice will dump Mac for the next guy who comes along, because you just know that Alice is not exactly a "long term relationship kind of gal."

I also saw this ad:

Yeah, I love this company.  This is the one who sends you live animals for selling something.  In this case:

and just when you think that can't be topped:

I would have paid cash money to have seen the look on the mothers' faces when they saw a pair of pigeons or rabbits sitting by their mailbox.

See you tomorrow!

Oh, Bizarro! Me Want to Feel Your Super-Muscles!

It's no secret that I'm not a huge fan of Superman, but there is one thing about the Big Blue Boy Scout that I dearly love:

Bizarro Superman.

In this issue, Bizarro's started employing Bizarro logic, which is where they say the opposite of what they mean.  All the time.  It's like in elementary school when someone would declare it was "Opposite Day," only it never ended.

It was still a pretty new concept, which explains why the jury is finding Superman "guilty" and not "innocent."  It takes a while to get used to Bizarro logic, and this story is more of a transition to it, because it's not followed 100%.

F'rinstance....

First a little origin for those of you not hip to the scene:

Okay, the ray only makes imperfect duplicates. Got that?

So, naturally:

Anyhoo, Bizarro eventually made a duplicate of Lois Lane that was a "Bizarro Lois" (or "Lois Bizarro," as the case may be.  They leave Earth to find their own world, which makes its first appearance in this issue. 

But they aren't there long before Bizarro Lois (who, if she's really the opposite of Lois Lane, should be a rational woman of great decorum and self-restraint) gets lonely.  So, Bizarro starts making copies of Bizarro Lois so she'll have someone else to complain to.

Now, if this were truly Bizarro World, all the women would be direct with one another and no one would be looking to take digs at the others.  But again, the idea of a situation employing complete Bizzarro logic just isn't quite there:

Sooooo....

At this point, while I hate to be that guy, I have to point something out: If the machine makes imperfect duplicates, why is the machine making perfect copies of Bizarro and Bizarro Lois? I mean, a perfect copy of an imperfect thing is still a perfect thing?

Anyway.

They keep cranking out the copies until...

well, this:

And, back to the comic:

But on Bizarro World, wouldn't the boss do the work while they employees sat around and barked orders?

Okay... nice one.

But then:

But on Bizarro World, wouldn't the restaurant pay me for eating there?

I know.  I sound like "Comic Book Guy" from The Simpsons.

Anyhoo, Superman finds himself running foul of Bizarro Code:

This would later become the template for television shows on basic cable television networks in the United States.

The trial goes on:

Hey, I thought these trials were supposed to be the opposite of how trials were ran here!  Looks like another day at the office to me!

I kid, of course.... sorta.

All things considered, even a flawed in not-being-flawed-enough Bizarro story rocks. 

BAH, indeed!

See you Monday!

An Orgy of Spending!

Still uber-busy, but the project at work is shaping up well so I can't complain.  Much.  

Meanwhile, let's all take a break with Pep Comics #59, starting with an installment of Well... Touche! (tm!):

Well... Touche!  (tm!)

Hey!  Do you see what I see?

One of our surprisingly rare CMNS Random Spankings! (tm!)  It's a special day indeed!

How did Eddie get the cash to keep Fickle Francine around?  Apparently, he wrote this, an ad for which I found on the back cover of this very issue!

Apparently, all you have to do to win her is to throw money at her gold-diggin' self.  There.  I just saved you 98 cents and the stigma of having something "in a plain wrapper" jutting of your mailbox.  Because I'm a giver.  It's what I do.

See you tomorrow!

Metropolis Restaurants Should be Listed on Yelp!

Got a rather large project going on at work so posts may be a little brief for the next few weeks, Dear Ones.  Don't take it personally.  Uncle Adam adores you.

Meanwhile, here's a little something from Action Comics #262:

The Daily Planet Staff visits Metropolis's lowest-reviewed Mexican restaurant.

And here's some career advice, courtesy of Joe Rumdum from Pep Comics #59:

Well, that's sound advice, but that's not what I did, so back to the grind for me!

See you tomorrow!

Streaky Whizzes!

Action Comics #261 is a landmark of sorts.  Not in a "Mount Rushmore" sort of way, but it's still worth noting.

Not because of this:

Yeah, give the orphans little images of yourself, Supes.  Keepin' it super-classy!

No, it's awesome because we have the first appearance of:

Streaky, the Super-Cat!

That's actually a good name for a cat like that.  I have a terrible time naming my pets.  There's so much pressure to come up with an appropriate name.  Usually, the animal is too busy getting used to the idea that s/he will be living with us (and won't be dinner) to show much personality.  So, by the time I really get to know the critter, it's already been saddled with a generic name.

Anyway, this is Streaky's awesome origin!:

I don't remember what the deal was with the chemicals, but I'm sure Linda was doing something she shouldn't have been.  She was kind of the Jan Brady of the Superman Family back in the day.

I like it!  It makes me feel tingly!

And lo, we have a Super-Cat!  Because exposure to radiation always gives you super-powers!  The government just doesn't want you to know!

This is the part where Streaky endears himself to me forever:

Good job, Streaky!  Tear apart every Superman-related thing you can find!

Streaky's first adventures are a mixed bag. You have the expected "raiding the milk truck" and "giving an unfriendly dog his come-uppance" moments, but you also get awesomeness like this:

I don't know why that tickled me, but it did.

And then there was this:

Oh, Streaky.  You are so under-utilized.  I demand a Streaky mini-series from DC, post haste.  I'm finally getting my sequel to The Incredibles, so I think this is my year.

See you tomorrow!

Nothing to Do But Pose for Pictures!

And we're back!  With some fun from Pep Comics #56, with an installment of What Could Possibly Go Wrong? (tm!):

What Could Possibly Go Wrong? (tm!)

And let's start the new era with a new meme.

I like to call this one...

Brother's Got Game (tm!)

Brother's Got Game (tm!)

Finally, here's a little something from Action Comics #261:

See you tomorrow!

You're Evil! Get Out!

Dear Ones, I'm afeared it's staycation time!  I'm going to take a week and enjoy the advent of warmer weather.

Sooo... NEW POSTS WILL RESUME ON MONDAY, MARCH 24th.  'salright?

But before I spend the week barbecuing in my pajamas, let's take a look at Action Comics #261: 

Okay, before anyone makes the joke about "Urko the Terrible," I'll make it first:

The point was that Urko clearly states he is a "form of life."  Got that?  Because it's important.

So, if you just look like someone Superman is fond of, he'll let you beat him to death.  I'm starting to see a strategy that might be of interest to the Composite Superman.

Anyway, check this out:

And then...

So, to review:  Urko was a life-form.  He was trying to flee.  Superman casually destroyed him.

How is this not a big deal????

Anyway... check out this letters page.  After reading the contents of the letters, I'm pretty sure Superham is trying to vaporize them with his eyeball-rays there...:

See?  Even back then, nerds took their comics way too seriously.

I'll miss you guys!  See you on the 24th!