Let's check in on Action Comics #326, or as I like to call it:
All Kinds of Awesome.
Man, can Lois just not shut up about Superman? I can see why she didn't have anyone to socialize with other than co-workers.
Okay, kids... NEVER NEVER NEVER leave the boat, especially if you aren't wearing a life vest. I don't care how good of a swimmer you are. STAY WITH THE BOAT. I literally don't care if a sea serpent is chasing you. Don't do what you see in comics, folks.
Now onto the good stuff:
You can't go wrong with monsters in comics. You really can't.
Hmm... okay, so Superman's usual invulnerability does not apply to these creatures. Does everyone get that?
Because Superham clearly does not:
Okay, if the creature can pierce your clothing, why would you think it's safe to fly right into a similar creatures web? Superham just doesn't think half the time. That's what happens when you can fly and bullets bounce off you.
I love that thing's facial expression.
Considering that thing's compound eyes...
... his aim is dreadful. Even if he got a chunk of arm there, why wouldn't you go for the body? It's a much bigger target.
So, they're fighting each other and Metropolis is saved? Well... thanks for nothing, I guess. That problem kind of solved itself. I don't see why we needed Superham for much of anything here.
Well, I suppose there's this:
You know what else was awesome? The model in this ad:
I found a picture of it on the interwebs:
Okay, I just want one. I would paint "Kooba Cola" on those green soda bottles. You'd know you were in the presence of fine art if you saw "Kooba Cola" painted on those bottles.
See you tomorrow!