From All-Star Comics #53-54!
So the recession has hit and you've been downsized? Time to call on:
This is actually decent advice if you're young enough to use it. My problem is that I'm only good at one thing..... and you're reading it right now.
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Hey, kids! Fancy a quick game of President?
I'm the first to say I don't pick up new games very quickly. I'm not like Nephew Sam, who can pop one of his vidya games in the machine and start playing away with barely a glance at the manual and impatiently clicking his way through the tutorials. Me, I need to practically take a night course just to get the basics down.
But this is, bar none, one of the most confusing games I've ever seen in my life.
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I love how they're all thinking the same thing. No one has any stray thoughts of where they're going for lunch, whether they left the stove on, or the last time they fed their cat. That, my friends, is some dang fine concentration.
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Oh, my. That's.... quite a belt there. Colorful and whatnot.
Am I the only one thinking about the Village People right now? I am? Okay.
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So, what does your name mean?
Now, see, if I were to have guessed, I would have thought that Eunice meant "Pesters random strangers on the street for their autographs."
Who is Clark Taylor? Is he the platter waddy whose records are selling like sixty?
No, wait... that's Jimmy Wakely.
Okay, I give up.
See you tomorrow!
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5 comments:
Sure it's easy to get a job if Superboy is your guidance counselor. Where I went to school you'd have to be at least a low-level criminal for the counselors to even know your name. A law-abiding kid like me flew about a mile under their radar. Fortunately, I spent a lot of time in the band room, which prepared me for a lifetime of success as a professional musician. HA!
I can explain "President". Ever see one of those old comics where the people were so beyond bored they were tossing playing cards into a tophat? This is that. Except that the comic publishers decided to redeem themselves by making it a tiny bit educational ("Learn the names of 7 US presidents!"). This comes in handy, years later, for example, when watching Jeopardy and a question comes on about a US president. You can shout these names at the screen ("Adams! Jefferson! Taft! IT'S GOTTA BE TAFT!!!") and one of them is almost certain to be right (unless it's a daily double. Then, you're screwed).
My autograph used to sell like sixty... some days it even sold like seventy, damn it.
Young Jim is pretty good at carrying a car with one hand. Too bad he's about to get his arm broken by that lamppost.
I wonder how many kids sent in shredded box tops from Ralston products? That was my first thought.
"Hey, I know...let's give the kids a game where they're aiming for Presidents! Each kid has one, two, or three Presidents as their targets! But they lose points if they hit Lincoln. He was already taken."
And in our next episode...
Superboy! Child abductor!
And Clark taylor?
Isn't that the name of Clark Taylor?
Taft?!? Really?
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