Grammar Police

I have a degree in English, but that's not so I can nit-pick your grammar. No, it's so I can give a qualified opinion that Shakespeare is painful to read. However, there are a couple of things that just grate on my last nerves, grammar-wise.

One of them is when people say the opposite of what they mean without knowing it. My personal peeve here is when people say, "I could care less." Well, dear ones, that means you care. You are trying to say, "I couldn't care less." 'Nuff said?

The other things that really unplugs my stereo is a mixed metaphor. Now I know we're lucky the Hulk can talk at all (this is back in the days when he was more cognizant than he was through the 70's and early 80's, but not quite as well spoken as his "grey Hulk" days), but check out this mixed metaphor.

Okay, you are either trying to smash me into the ground like a nail or you are trying to squash me as flat as a pancake. If you are truly trying to smash me into the ground like a pancake..... well, let's just say I'm not having pancakes with the Hulk until we clarify this.