That Time the Monkey and the Skeletons Fought Some Guys Over Vases.

So, I took a look at Lightning Comics #2 and found a few high points, starting with some Fun with Out of Context Dialogue (tm!):

It was at this point that most would agree that the Mastermind's admiration of the Colonel had crossed a line.

Heh.... "injection."

And now, another episode of Well.... Touche! (tm!)

Well.... Touche! (tm!)

And then this happened:

And finally, I read a feature called "Congo Jack."  He didn't really dress like I would expect someone to dress for the Congo, but I've never actually been to the Congo, so what would I know about it?

But I do know this:

That creature is all kinds of awesome!

See you Monday!

Nicky Started Rushing Me... And I Liked It!

Because we can't do Batman every day.

Here's something I didn't notice back when we covered Boy Meets Girl #10:

Hmmmmm.... "Independent Sixteen" may cost you your independence for 16 years, depending on the consent laws in your State.  I don't care how much winkin' she's doin', fellas... it ain't worth prison.

On to the next issue!

So... Ann's parents are telling her to date around?  What are they, her pimps?  You're in a healthy, committed relationship with a fine young man, Ann.  And we expect you to put a stop to it or we will!

Man... they're pretty hardcore.  Unless Ann and Hal are talking about marriage or something, they should probably count their blessings that their daughter isn't dating around.  What awful parenting.

See?  Now she has a date with a boy named, "Stuffy."  This is what happens when you don't leave well enough alone.  Learn from this, parents!

Also, Hal has been totally friend-zoned:

Oh, man... DENIED!  And call me a pig, but it seems like Hal should be rather insulted that he's been placed in the same league as every boy she dates.  Will you be needing that knife back, Ann?

Enough of her.  On to some girl in nursing school whose name I forget:

Well... I guess it ain't sexual harassment if she likes it, but don't do what Nicky did, fellas.  There's nonsense you can only get away with if you're rich.  If that guy from 50 Shades of Gray wasn't a billionaire, he'd have been on a sex offender registry somewhere.  That's the power of cash.

Ah... silliness!  See you tomorrow!

Batman has a Bat-Tector! FEAR THE BAT-TECTOR!

So, it's 1966 and it's Batman, so you're going to see villains making lots of puns relevant to their gimmicks:

Okay, that's enough.

I SAID THAT'S ENOUGH!

And then this happened:

I'm not sure what the Bat-Tector is, but I'm sure I don't want to.

If you run Bat-Tector on the Google, you'll get nothin'.  Well, now you'll get this page because I mentioned it, but other than that... nothin'.

Now, this is awful:

See Batman there?  Check out this from 2 years earlier:

What makes this pathetic is the fact that this illustration, drawn by the legendary Carmine Infanto 2 years earlier, is freakin' iconic.  If you're going to do a cut and paste, pick something a bit less obvious.

Remember yesterday when I was complaining about Catwoman's green costume?  It wasn't just me:

Hmmmm... I'm starting to think that DC and Marvel both owe Michael Lederman of Brooklyn a royalty.

See you tomorrow!

Batman and Catwoman Fashions! Collect Them All!

And we're back!  Let's get back into our groove thang with some random Batman panels.

Every few issues of Batman in the later 100's was a reprint issue.  Sometimes, that's handy because I'll see things I missed the first time, like this shot of Batman and Robin in loincloths fighting a giant gorilla:

'

That's the stuff.

Catwoman's outfit there was the go-took look not only for the Golden Age, but she reverted back to it (well, the boots were different, but I'm a guy so I don't really count that) in the 1970's.  In the interim, we had this:

Because nothing says "I'm trying to look like a cat" like wearing green.  It's not that it isn't more functional than the skirt, it's just that... well, I haven't seen very many green cats, and I'd certainly remember if I had.  And, to be fair, it's not like there are that many light purple cats either, so I can't argue that the first outfit makes a lot of sense.  It's just that... green doesn't say "cat" to me.  Is it just me?  It can't be me, because that look didn't last long.

Hey, check it out!: 

I'm pretty sure this is a regular immunity challenge on Survivor.

Here's a look at a PSA from Batman #200:

Not that I don't agree with what Batman is saying there, but... Shut Up, Robin. (tm!)

See you tomorrow!

Batman Works at a Grocery Store and Superman... I'm Not Sure What That was All About

Hey, gang!

I'm going to take a little staycation next week, so no new posts.  Sorry!  I'll be back Monday, April 6th with more silliness.

For a great detective, Batman sure didn't have much of a poker face:

Why are you looking at each other like that?

Like what?

When I said that Bruce Wayne was next in line, it's almost like gigantic punctuation marks appeared over your heads.

Nonsense!

And in issue #191, we see why it was necessary for Batman to be independently wealthy as opposed to working a normal job:

Wait!  Wait!  I got this!  DON'T punch customers, DO punch bank robbers!  I got it mixed up, but I'll get it right next time!

And sometimes it wouldn't even be Batman's fault:

See?  I can't imagine that looking good on the old performance review.

Meanwhile, from Robert Gillis, here's a little bit of disturbing Fun with Out of Context Artwork from Lois Lane #73:

We weren't sure what the title of this panel would be, but I think we agreed on:

 Fifty Shades of Grey Kryptonite.

Yeah, we have too much time on our hands.

Anyway, I'll see you guys April 6th!

The Man Who Rubbed Out Batman... But Not in a Dirty Way.

You can't be talking about weird things in comic books without mentioning The Eraser:

Yeah, he doesn't actually do that.  Which is kind of a shame, because that would be hella cool.  Wasn't there a character somewhere that did that sort of thing?  Well... although it should have been The Eraser, because... you know, THE ERASER.... this is more of a metaphorical image than what actually does.

This is more along the lines of what The Eraser actually looks like in combat:

Which is why they went all existential on the cover, because that image sure wouldn't have sold comics.

Why is he The Eraser?

So he was an eraser like the character in that Schwarzenegger movie, only this guy dressed the part.  And I've got to tell you... when Robin is calling you out on your ridiculous get-up, you have crossed a line what isn't going to be erased.

Get it?

His awesome raison d'etre?

Really?  You must be completely incapable of taking criticism for it to drive you to a life of crime like that.

Okay, what does that have to do with erasing things?  Cheater.

That's the problem with having your weapons on your shoes:  There's no way to attack someone without being completely off balance and looking silly.  Like this guy.

Robin: A One-Man Sound Effect Theatre! (tm!)

Yeah... if you go around wearing that get-up, expect it to get smushed on your head.  You gave up on dignity the minute you wore an eraser on your head and dressed like a Number 2 Yellow.

And now, Advice Not Worth Repeating (tm!)!

This has been Advice Not Worth Repeating! (tm!)

See you tomorrow!

The Tragic Tale of Gaggy, The Joker's First Sidekick

Sorry about missing yesterday's post, Dear Ones.  I get into work mode and I just can't focus on anything else until I've solved it.  Let's make up for it with the kinda awesome but kinda sad story of Gaggy, the Joker's original sidekick:

Yup... long before Joker would have his emotionally-abusive relationship with Harley Quinn, he had Gaggy.  Yes, "Gaggy" sounds like The Ventriloquist saying the word, "baggy."  But that's the hand we're dealt, and we're playing it:

Gaggy even had super-powers.  Well, at least one super power:

Where did that come from?  No one knows.  If you find that annoying, check out the origin story:

Why was he a refugee?  Why did he resort to crime?

We would learn years later that Gaggy was a tightrope walker in the circus.  He lost his job and was put in a freak show, which understandably soured him.  But for now.... eh, comics were 12 cents.

Isn't that sweet?  And it kinda makes sense.

Yeah, that really does a great job of hiding your identity, Gaggy.  You are truly a Master of Disguise! (tm!)

Hey!  It's time for Fun with Out of Context Dialogue! (tm!)

Yeah, I'm not proud of that one, but there it is.

Anyway, Gabby was surprisingly effective:

Yup.  This guy whooped on Robin, fair and square.

And that's not just a random thing.  Gaggy has a serious hate for Robin:

So why was that?  Again... it was never explained.  Again: 12 cents.

Gaggy's go-to move was apparently to climb up Batman's back and cover his eyes:

Waitaminute... doesn't he have a debilitating screaming power?  I mean, he's right by Batman's ears.

Anyway:

Followed by a ton of sound effects:

But Gaggy took it well, as long as he had the Joker's approval.

What's sad is that Gaggy wouldn't appear again for dang near five hundred issues.  Yup.  Five hundred.

And even then, it was a flashback story.

So, what was the rest of the story?

Well, Gaggy would resurface again in Gotham City Sirens #4-6.  It turns out Gaggy's time as the Joker's cellmate was short-lived.  After the Joker killed six people and got sent to Arkham, the two lost touch (which was surprising, considering Gaggy had proven to be dang competent in battle).  Gaggy would later attempt a return to his glory days.... days which didn't include Harley Quinn:

Gaggy also mentioned that he didn't understand why he hated Robin so much.  I suppose it could have simply been "sidekick rivalry," if that's a thing.  But more likely, it was because (as we learned 500 issues later in Batman#682) Gaggy lost his job at the circus when the Flying Graysons came along. Did Gaggy recognize Robin as one of the former Flying Graysons in some way?  Was he just fated to hate them, whether he recognized them or not?  It's an interesting idea.

Anyway, Gaggy would make a cameo in Batman #686.  Other than the story arc in Gotham City Sirens (which was an awesome series), his only other appearance of note was ... you guessed it... in Batman: The Brave and the Bold animated series:

Best. Animated Series. Ever.

See you tomorrow.