Hi, Big Shot!

Continuing our look at Pep Comics #29, let's savor the many facial expressions of Archie Andrews:

That's right.  Drink it in.

I also noticed in this issue that the Hangman had a power that was fairly unique: A cape that would disappear and reappear at random times.  Thusly:

I didn't say it was a particularly helpful power.

Meanwhile, a trifecta of Random Sucker Punches! (tm!) from Startling Comics #19:

A) I am going to say "Hi, Big Shot!" to someone today and B) I'm not sure, but I think the punch knocked the guy's head clean off his body.  "UG," indeed!

Well, if you wear breeches in the country like that, you kind of get what you get.

I don't know if that's actually a Random Sucker Punch (tm!) because an object was used, but I love it when people say, "Take that!"

See you tomorrow!

Dusty, the Spectacular Bystander

Ah, it's good to be back!  Let's celebrate with a look at Pep Comics #27:

Singing never looks right in comics.  But they did it a lot back in the Golden Age.

WHOA!  I'm not touching that one.

Did I mention they loved to show singing?

I presume he's either standing in the glow of a light somewhere or he has megadosed on carotene.

Good idea, Shield!  Since today seems to be all about singing, let's check out The Cure!

Okay, that's not what he probably meant.

He's a Nazi spy, Dusty!  Kick him in the nards!

Um... Dusty?  You on vacation or something?

I'm not suggesting I'm a hero by any stretch of the imagination, but it seems like Dusty is off to a slow start there...

Great, Boy Detective!  It's a shame you couldn't have done that moments ago when you were standing right next to him and it was revealed that he was a Nazi spy.

But apparently, Dusty did not beat him to a pulp, because we had this encounter a few pages later:

Okay, Dusty!  To review: He's got a gun and he just shot a defenseless old man, so you should probably act while you've still got the element of sur-

OH, FOR THE LOVE OF....!

THERE!  Was that so hard?

You mustn't die, Paul!  Lest the Shield find out I may be a "spectacular boy detective," but that really doesn't translate into combat skills!

Egad!

See you Monday!

Why Does the Fat Kid Always Get the Grunt Work?

Dear Ones, I have a heck of a day coming, so there probably won't be a new post tomorrow.  Sorry about that, but I'll be back in the saddle, better than ever, on Friday!

Meanwhile, let's take a look at Golden Age Green Lantern #17:

Excuse me???

So, if my friend is under arrest and tries to escape, the cops get to shoot me?  What the heck passed for police procedure back in the 40's?

Meanwhile...

Green Lantern's friends spent considerably less time with him after his conversion to the Church of Saturn...

Hey!  It's Captain Tootsie!

What I want to know is where the heck Jimmy found a live hand grenade?  I would understand if she said that he found in the belongings of a relative who had returned from war, but he just found it?  Was this a common problem in America back in the day?  Hootin' Zoots!

How Can I Refuse You, Segreb?

Still plowing through a very difficult week, but we're getting there.  Thank goodness for Action Comics #173!

And now, courtesy of Congo Bill, another installment of

Well... Touche! (tm!)

Well... Touche! (tm!)

I'm coming to the conclusion that, despite keeping up a solo feature in Action Comics for what seems like an eternity, Congo Bill wasn't one of your greatest heroes.

Exhibit "B"... a CMNS Random Slap! (tm!):

But, as is often the case, a modern revamp of the character made him awesome.

... by putting his brain into a gorilla.

For those of you who aren't comic nerds, I'm not making that up.  That's what it took.  And granted, he probably gets slapped a lot less often these days, but it's a gimmick that was actually used by the same comics company since 1981 when the brain of a super-villain called the Ultra-Humanite found its way into a giant ape.

But then again, while all gorillas are apes, not all apes are gorillas.  And the Ultra-Humanite was an albino ape (they never specified what kind of ape), and as you can see, Congo Bill is golden.

So it's totally different, I suppose.  Hur-de-dur.

Meanwhile, this really disturbed me:

Watching any animal fight another for your entertainment is really a dick move and there's a special place in Hell for you if you support this in any way, shape or form.  That is all.

And frankly, I want verification of this:

What?  So a quick visit to Bass Pro and Mr. Bulky's, and I'm a tycoon among the Eskimos?  Someone near Alaska tell me if this is the case, because I think I've found my next get-rich-quick scheme.

See you tomorrow!

Four Fearless American Boys Hitting the Highroad of Adventure!

Going through some tough times at work, but maybe a look at Pep Comics #18 will cheer me up:

I've talked about the Four Comrades before (which is an interesting name considering "Comrade" is something that we think Russians always say), but I don't think I've done proper justice to their choices in hatwear.

Okay, first?  I didn't realize this before, but I think Black Satan actually had horns.  I thought it was a hairstyle, but I'm thinking he has horns in his head.  How/why does he have horns in his head?

And second, is that child wearing a codpiece?

As you can see, that panel is really disturbing.  Let's watch Captain Future fighting a giant mutated lizard:

That's better.

And now, for the third time, I give you...

Gah! (tm!)

GAH! (tm!)

This should go without saying, but don't startle an armed criminal with bubble gum, kids.  How on earth did previous generations survived long enough to produce children is become more and more of a head-scratcher.

Cleopatra! Hedy Lamarr! Veronica Lodge!

 Even the most casual comic book nerdlinger knows about Spider-Man's foe, the Lizard.  I mean, he was the villain in The Amazing Spider-Man movie last year.  But, as you might expect, a name like the Lizard had been used before.  Check out these bits from Golden Age Green Lantern #16:

I have to admit, the name really confuses me.  The "flaming salamanders" were apparently mythical creatures, so I guess I understand the gimmick, but why would a Lizard be a "master of fire?"  Shouldn't he have just called himself "the Flaming Salamander?"  Because I could totally get behind that...

And we have the big reveal that at least explains the costume:

He was wearing asbestos?  I suspect his legal problems are going to be the least of his worries.

Robert Gillis hasn't popped up in a while, but it's always awesome when he does.  These come from a story that I believe originally appeared in Detective Comics #168, later reprinted in the Secret Origins of Super-Villains Treasury from 1975. 

First, it's time for some Fun with Out of Context Dialogue! (tm!):

Let's follow it up with some Excessively Impossibly Expository Monlogue! (tm!)

I dunno.... that's one slow-moving wall if you're able to process all that.

Thanks, Robert!

Pep Comics gave us the first introduction of Veronica Lodge to the Archie Universe:

I never rooted for Archie to forgo Betty in the pursuit of Veronica.  Betty was a solid, All-American girl, while Veronica... well, Veronica was a smug little princess with entitlement issues.  I would assume that, should Archie ever reach maturity, he would regret all the energy he wasted chasing Veronica when he already had the attention of uber-cool Betty.

Then again, your average guy generally has at least one girl he regrettably overlooked while he spent too much time pursuing that one that wasn't right for him.  That's just part of growing up, I suppose.

On the plus side, she seems to have motivated the Riverdale boys to dress better.  I mean, he isn't exactly rocking that sweater-vest, but it's an improvement over the "vagrant Dennis the Menace" look he had been sporting up until then.

See you Monday!

Never Cross a Man Wearing a Bolo Tie...

Let's continue our look at Pep Comics #26, shall we?  

I wasn't raised Catholic, but I've certainly seen and read about nuns in Catholic school and how hardcore they were about discipline.

All I can tell you is...

... your average schoolhouse nun has nothing on that guy.

One of the more recent CMNS meme's, Well, THAT Took a Very Dark Turn! (tm!), has gone over quite well with you darlings, so let's do another!

Oh, Thomas!  You lazy scamp!

Well, THAT Took a Very Dark Turn! (tm!)

And finally... Hey!  It's time for some Fun with Out of Context Dialogue! (tm!):

Now, anyone that has read this blog at all knows that I do not condone the use of "gay" as a slur or as a negative connotation for anything, and I'm certainly not meaning that here.

But that's pretty dang funny.

See you tomorrow!